Thursday, September 22, 2011

It's 3 am, I must be lonely

I'm awake at 3 am. For me that's normal, but it shouldn't be, I know this. I know I should be sleeping away like my husband. But I'm a night owl. I always have been. I'm most productive at night. I feel my best at night. I HATE mornings and staying up late gives me a reason to sleep in all morning. Staying awake takes advantage of my life right now. I mean, I work from home and set my own hours. Hubs can fend for himself in the morning. I have no children to attend to. Staying up late makes me feel less sad about the later.

Today I was having these weird cravings for licorice. I don't like licorice but I wanted it. Of course this made me think, "hey maybe I'm pregnant". But I'm not. I never am. I'm broken.

We applied for adoption last week. The agency is reviewing us. I'm thrilled at the prospect but scared we won't be accepted.I know that we will have kids on God's time not ours. I get that. But I'll still be heart broken until that time so here's hoping and praying.

1 comment:

  1. I hope you guys get certified! Some of our friends can't have kids either and they just found out they are getting they're second adopted baby this winter! Good luck!

    also its funny you mention that you stay up late because the other night I wanted to text you as I read all the notes you wrote me in HS that my mom just sent me. But I thought you would be asleep with the time difference! HAHA!